Vacuous Questions - March 17, 2006

Flip Flopper In Chief, Qué Pasó Nena?
Well, you can't have a much more girlier man than one who can't live without grabbing at women's dress hems and silently screaming: "beat me, flog me, just don't leave me!" Imagine, this Flip, Flip Flopper In Chief is encircled by Dominatrices: His cold as a witch's tit mamma, his dark as Hades and evil as Hitler Condosleezza Rice, his enabler Harriet Miers, and his dumber but butcher'n hell Karen "Polyester Pantsuit but Inane" Hughes, who is dumber than the blind salamanders so famous in her back yard. And this is the Führer 59,054,087 U.S. Sans Brains, Ethics or Patriotism twice "elected" as president? Anyway, tonight some of the gang just had some little questions about the grand plans to have Karen Hughes solve the questions of the Middle East.

 

First, Karen, Tell Us Again, Where is the Middle East?
Oh, is that the place where women are dying to wear pants like yours and drive cars? Is that their dying passion, their only dream?

With all of the events of the recent 15 days, have you been hiding your derrière where Cheney hides his when things beyond your comprehension are occurring? If not, then how come you haven't been out there in the forefront explaining "the west" to the Middle East? Oh goodness, they didn't muzzle you, did they? Heck, gal, we're paying your salary, so you are accountable to us, not only the guy whose butt you spank.

 

A Day's Labor For a Day's Pay
Hey, Karen, are you giving us our money's worth? Big title you got there gal, are we gettin' what George thinks your worth?

 

Hey gal, explain to the U.S., just what is the Euro-Mediterranean Partnership, or the Barcelona Process? Whatcha doin' to make it work? Or, do you even know what it is and when it was implemented? There's no time to play with your kid in Austin right now gal, you gotta produce, sweetie pie.

 

Well, gal, you're not as overtly repulsive or as well-recognized as the Big Mamma of Torture as 'Sleezza' Rice is, but you're close. So, if you have any redeeming virtues, explain to your country, in twelve paragraphs or less for each item, since your fellow citizens are going to be requiring it of you, what the follow subjects/headlines concern:

 

1) Israel Assaults West Bank Prison
2) Leaders Sehebaa Farms is Lebanese Territory
3) Iran, India, Pakistan Start Talks on Gas Pipeline
4) Body Counts in Iraq Keep Rising
5) Olmert Declares Ariel Settlement in West Bank Will Remain
6) Russia-Syria Arms Deal Legitimate
7) Abbas Urges EU to Continue Aid to Palestinian Government
8) Finland Pushes Dialogue on Islam
9) UN Report: Syria is Cooperating
10) Democracy May Be a Priority in the EU's Southern Policy
11) On Oil, Bush Deploys Vast Reserves of Ineptitude
12) This Is Why Islamists are Winning

 

So, Suburban-driving soccer-mom, the U.S. is holding you to account. What are the twelve-paragraph answers to these subjects? The country is waiting for your answers; if you can't answer, give up your lucrative paycheck and go back to your dumb, blind salamanders, who all look and act like your prez.

 

Dinner Gong! Sorry Karen
Enough for one night. Let's see if together we can get the Hughes gal to answer these questions to your and our satisfaction. If not, you know the next step to take up the chain of command, but for now, let's eat.

 

Charlotte prepared some Eggplant and Mozzarella on Mille Feuilles. Normally, Charlotte would make her own puff pastry, but ranching concerns forced her to use a source from which we, in a bind, get our already-prepared puff pastry, Taylor's Market, which you can access at www.taylorsmarket.com for overnight delivery of puff pastry on ice. She chose a very nice dry sparkling wine from Gruet in New Mexico. Excellent pairing, and as appetizer, it did prepare us for the dishes that were yet to come.

Marie Christine had once tried Chinese Chicken and Aspargus Soup in Paris, and attempted to replicate the recipe for us. Did she succeed? She's never failed. Her soup was glorious, and paired with an Hidalgo Pastrana Amontillado Sherry, transported us to that land we love to live in, that of the contented gourmet the people at the local feed shop love to laugh at. Food geeks indeed; just 'cause we don't chew tobacco and spit on the floor. Now really.

 

Charlotte and Beatrix put a lot of effort into their beautiful Seafood Terrine, plated with Grilled Artichokes with Lemon Oil Dip. They paired these dishes with a good Chenin Blanc from South Africa. Difficult preparation but simple plating: a wonderful treat for us.

 

Art and Max served us small dollops of Strawberry Mousse to prepare our palates for our next course, the meat course.

The bank of three Viking grills was going on the porch, and Art and Max teamed up to fix us a true delight, their Grilled Texas T-Bone Steaks, with grilled Onion Rings, Bell Peppers and Zucchini, with a side of garlicky mashed potatoes. They paired their masterpiece with an Australian shiraz, the excellent McPherson South-Eastern Australia shiraz.

 

Calming Down
Beatrix made superb Poached Pears with Crème Frâiche, one of our favorite desserts. We had ours with small snifters of Grand Marnier, thanked tonight's "chefs" and returned to the great room to spend some time with the teenagers while we sipped our after-dinner coffee Max prepared for us from his special brews. Then, we put on our jackets and headed for our respective farms and ranches, always aware of different chores still waiting because of the strange, unusual tricks the weather has been playing on us.

 

Summary
The British have officially labeled Dubya a splendiferous inept. We can only imagine what the rest of the world thinks of us, and him, and yet Dubya keeps sending equally superbly inept "envoys" out to win the hearts and minds of the Arab and Muslim worlds. We, and the Arab and Muslims, deserve better than just Bush's derrière kissers. World events are signaling events of dire importance; too much importance for the infamously xenophobic, Texas-centric Karen Hughes, or the always attitude-challenged, snide to the point of grotesqueness Condosleezza.

©Copyright 2006 Grindstaff Chronicles. All Rights Reserved.
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Reprinted from The Grindstaff Chronicles Newsletter which is published in the USA by farmers, ranchers, and neighbors.

It is intended to share the thoughts and lifestyle of people who work hard, like to relax and enjoy life, and are often dismayed by news, politics, and the events of the day that defy common sense.
http://www.GrindstaffChronicles.com
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